The door creaked open and light filled the room. I gasped in fright, "Noooooooooo!" The Horror! It was gone, all gone. I began searching the house, under the bed, in the sink, behind the toaster, but I still could not find the cheese. “I'm going to starve,” I gasped. How could I ever eat nachos without cheese?
As I trembled with hunger, a loud slow knock sounded from my front door causing me to jump. I looked towards the front door as a flash of lightning lit up the sky and thunder rattled my house. I slowly walked to the door and peeked out the window, nobody was there. I swung the door open, and jumped back in surprise.
“I have a large cheese pizza for Mr. Kane,” a man in a tuxedo said. He held up a large briefcase for me to take. “Oh I’m sorry,” I said while catching my breath. “He lives across the street.” “Sorry for bothering you sir” the man said and turned to walk away. “Wait a second…” I thought “Cheese pizza! Wait!” I yelled and the man turned around. “I’ll give you $20 for that pizza,” I desperately asked. “I am sorry” the man said, “This pizza is for Mr. Kane’s eyes only.” I sighed and the close the door as the man walked away.
“I’m going to starve,” I thought to myself. “Where is cheese when you need it?” As I pondered my fate I heard a noise from upstairs, I listened closely and heard it again. It was an elderly women yelling “Help Me!” repeatedly. The voice repeated a dozen times before I realized what was happening. “Oh no!” I thought and rushed upstairs to my bedroom. I jumped over my bed and grabbed my cell phone but it was too late, it had stopped ringing.
“Hmm…” I thought while staring at my cell phone. I hit the pizza button and ordered an extra-large extra-cheesy pizza. “It will be delivered within 20 minutes” they assured me. I began pacing up and down the hall, questions filling my mind. Would I survive until the pizza arrived? Or would I starve to death in this 20 minute period of torture.
“Wait a second” I thought, “what if pizza cheese is incompatible with nachos.” I sprinted to my computer and got on Google. “Huh” I said while looking at the screen. “This isn’t Google.” Before me, on my dark flickering computer screen was something so scary, so sinister, that it can only be described as “not Google.” “Nooooooooooooooo!” I yelled again. The page said, in simple text, “The page cannot be displayed.” I had forgotten to pay my bills.
Before I had time to pay my bills and end world hunger, a squeaking noise came from outside, immediately followed by a single knock on the front door. “The cheese is here!” I thought in excitement and raced to the front door. I swung the door open gleefully and prepared to take the pizza, nobody was there.
I looked down at the ground sadly and to my surprise, a box of pizza was lying beside my feet. I quickly reached down and picked the box up, inside was a delicious looking, yet slightly moldy, pizza. But wait, there was something wrong with this pizza. “All of its cheese is missing” I sighed out loud, “and there are sardines all over it.” I stared down in disbelief at the pizza, I was doomed to starve to death due to lack of cheese.
To my right there was a rustling noise, I looked over there and was horrified to see a dead mouse lying beside my porch. Large patches of its fur were missing and its brain was visible through a hole in its skull.
“Did it just twitch?” I wondered while looking at it. Seconds later the mouse lunged forward at me with a loud squeak. I stumbled backwards in fright and began running away as fast as I could. I zoomed around the corner of my house and rammed into something.
Stumbling backwards I got a good look at what I had run into. It was a pizza delivery guy, but he looked messed up. His skin was a grayish color, his clothes torn to shreds, and his body covered in scratches. Upon closer inspection, I could see what appeared to be pizza cheese oozing out of his skull. “Cheeeeeeeeeeeeze” the man moaned and started stumbling towards me.
Quickly I started running again, and when I looked back again, I couldn’t believe my eyes, There was a swarm of zombie mice rushing towards me, and behind them a large group of cheese zombie people stumbling slowly in my direction. “Ugh” I thought, “its days like these that make me wish I wasn’t made of cheese”.